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Crossing to New Existence
I walk across the street in my black yoga pants and my orange H&M shirt. It was one of my favorite combinations for a workout or life in general. The clothes showed off my form without clinging to me. I still wanted to show off my figure to an imaginary possibility of romance, without the…
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Hello Again Cicidancer, byebye Marriage, and Onward in my journey alone
It has been 2 years since I decided to take a break from this safe place that I created to heal from my relationship wounds. It was at a point in my life that I felt my partner and I had grown a lot, since we had a near relationship-death scare when I found out…
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au revoir to my cicidancer blog, for now
I wanted to write a goodbye for my cicidancer blog. It has been a while since I updated. It has always been on my mind. Work(meeting with clients, volunteer counseling group, probono 1 on 1), other writing(such as notes or my Chinese blog) and reading(such as (psychology studies and fictional literatures) had taken precedence. I…
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The beauty in loneliness
As I stood on the sunniest spot on the lawn, in the middle of the a new lunch place we discovered, the Italian farm, I felt the familiar sensation of loneliness. It was a feeling I grew up with. Perhaps as the only child, I never had much company. Preoccupied with getting top ranking to…
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The mastery of ups and downs
The ups and downs of my own diet reminds me of the ups and downs of everything. After stuffing myself beyond the disciplined level of fullness, a measure I have been trying to live by lately, I found myself at my bathroom sink, enacting another regime, brushing my teeth. This can help cut off further…
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Am I firm enough as a mom? an exploration of my latest insecurity
I have been questioning if I have been firm enough with my child. That familiar struggle between the liberal American side and my Chinese upbringing. What would we do without some anxiety in our life? It keeps things interesting 🙂 I find myself confessing my qualm to acquaintances, people whom I would otherwise not seek…
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This is how it all started…
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William Smith
Writer & Journalist